Help! I need some advice with Elizabeth

[slovejoy]

I asked my husband for something AG for my birthday and he ended up buying me Elizabeth. I didn't even think that he might buy me a doll because I feel like I have so many already, but here she is. So my dilemma is that Elizabeth has never been on my want list because she reminds me so much of my brothers ex-girlfriend who was not the best for him. I think she is so pretty, but I just can't get beyond that thought when I look at her. Should I send her back and exchange her for something else. Anyone have any ideas for getting my brother ex off of her face? I love that my husband picked her out for me, but as things stand right now, I think she would spend more time in her box that my other girls, just because she doesn't give me the same warm fuzzies due to the resembelence. Any advice.

Thank-you!!
Shanna

[American_Mommy]

I am sure my advice is all wrong, but here goes...

It was amazingly sweet of your hubby to surprise you with her. She is such a beautiful doll.Your sweet hubby obviously put a great deal of thought into such a special gift.

Now this X girlfriend, she DOES NOT sound like such a great person. It sounds like she has already taken a toll on you/your brother. Don't let her take this from you too. Giving up Elizabeth because you can not stand that girl just lets her win... again.

Instead- KEEP Elizabeth. Keep her because she is from your Hubby, whom you no doubt love even more than you dislike your brother's x.

Play with Elizabeth. Change her clothes and her hairstyle. Rename her if you have to, but do not give her up. If you do, you may be very sad later. Not because you gave up the "doll" but because you gave up the "gift".

I hope something in there makes some sense. Good luck, whatever you do. [img]graemlins/rose.gif[/img]

<font color="#33CCCC" size="1">[ July 29, 2006 01:47 AM: Message edited by: American_Mommy ]</font>

[Miss_Nellie_OMalley]

I agree with American_Mommy. My husband gave me Elizabeth for our 3rd aniversery and this alone makes her indispensable to me. I think you need to tell yourself that Elizabeth does not look like that ex girlfriend... because its obvious to me and I'm sure other board members that the ex-girlfriend was an ugly cow that not even a train wreck could help her looks... unlike Elizabeth who is beautiful and sweet because she was given with love.

This is advice just based on what you've given us. I don't know the whole situation or your husband. If you are still wrestling with her talk to him about it. And maybe he'll pick another doll out for you.

I have this same problem with names... if I have a bad experience with someone it will permantly scar that name for me hence forth. It's taken me 15 years to get over the name Mackenzie because there was a little girl that use to make fun of me as a child...so I can totally sympathize.

[Avione]

Perhaps reading Elizabeth's book will help you connect the idea of the beautiful doll with the sweet character, and not the ex-girlfriend. [img]smile.gif[/img]

[Kenshinchan]

Bad advice: If you can't bond with her, have your other dolls gang up on her and be mean to her for spite. Just make sure your husband isn't around when it happens, or else he might be a bit hurt, though you could explain they're hazing the new girl. [img]wink.gif[/img]

Good advice is the above, especially the hairstyle changes and the reading her book. Do the illustrations look anything like the ex-girlfriend? If not, try to associate your Elizabeth with those pictures. Unless the ex was a Colonial recreationist, hopefully the clothes will help you distance the doll from the woman, too.

Do you think your brother would see the resemblance? You could ask him; if he doesn't see a resemblance, maybe that will help you get over it. MAYBE you could even take Elizabeth to visit your brother, and see if he does anything fun with her; then you'll have positive brother memories with her instead of the negative ex thoughts.

Just brainstorming for you. It was a very thoughtful gift; best of luck bonding!

[3castles]

I agree with everyone above. If my DH bought her for me, I could never give her up. Besides, he'd probably never buy me another AG if I returned one!

Change her clothes and her hairstyle, heck you could even change her coloring a little. Look at the sticky at the top of the page for face paints. What I'm saying is, if you used the stencil cream on her cheeks applied with a fingertip and maybe repainted her lips would she still remind you of his X? Just a thought, maybe a slight change is all you need to get past the issue.

Good luck!

[dalmatian101]

I feel that way about Kit, she reminds me of someone I'd rather forget! Elizabeth is very pretty and since your DH was so thoughtful, I would try to change her in a way so she no longer reminds you of the Ex girlfriend, at least it wasn't your DH's Ex that she looks like. Give her a little make up and maybe a new hair style...good luck.

[vew-tori]

How does your DH feel? Would he be hurt if you excahnged her? My DH gave me Felicity and DD Elizabeth for Valentines. Before I even opened her he told me I could exchange her. DD already had Felicity and I was hoping for Addy or Kit. The board thought I should keep her but I knew the DH would not be hurt so in the end I got Kit. It was the right choice in our family. If I were you I would just talk to him about it then decide. He may have chosen her because she reminds him of you [img]wink.gif[/img] .

[AGMommy]

I agree with much of what's been already said.

Give yourself time with Elizabeth. What must've made your brother's ex-girlfriend unattractive was her personality, and how she treated your brother. You'll see Elizabeth differently if you get to know her, by reading her books and playing with her. Most important of all, the fact your DH bought her for you speaks volumes. (Makes me think of a young boy buying the wrong-colored shirt for his mother. His heart was so much in it, LOL!) I'd rather hold on to her, to keep from hurting him.

Now, I've just been hit with another idea. Maybe for Christmas you could ask for Felicity? Or another AG for Elizabeth's friend? That way, maybe some of the sting will lessen even more. Once you increase your collection, you won't notice the ex's resemblence as much, and will most likely even be glad you have her. [img]wink.gif[/img]

[AGMommy]

Shanna, I reread your post and saw just now realized you have a large collection. I think the idea of the other dolls teasing her is funny. It might work! Again, just give yourself time with her, LOL!